Wednesday, August 20, 2008

The summer round-up

Time doesn't fly or catch up to you. It plays itself out everyday on the same frame. 24 hours a day, tick tock. Time is the steady, life's constant yet we are the ones surprised by it. Like it played a trick on us and snuck up. I've been conscious but not receptive I guess to the idea that the summer is coming to a close. Intermission really is over although here in SoCal we get a little extension by way of September but still, it's ending. My sister living with us this summer took over many portions of my life that truthfully I was happy to give up for her. My vitamin taking, reading and blogging suffered but on the other hand SO much flourished: Yoga, so much laughter, a lot of great food and dinners, always having my own buddy when we went out, my closet grew under her tutelage and outfit suggestions, my power as a 'girl' increased and some fundamental life stuff was discussed. Naturally, Chadd and I had to incorporate someone else into our every moment and so a bit of independence and intimacy occurred but with our whole life together ahead of us we didn't mind so much.
I truly feel like there's been personal growth this summer and not just because of Elyse. Maybe this is what 30 is, the feeling isn't coming from the outside in but from my insides deciding more and more who I am. The me/I/mine that's kept me feeling like a character description who has to stay as described otherwise she'll become unrecognizable is melting as I embrace that I am an evolving human. allowed to change and grow. To shed layers and opinions. To "let my inner light shine" and direct me to places I've never been within. The yoga I've been taking has helped me connect with this physical form of mine and to respect it but to know that I too am just made up of energy and protein. My spiritual outlook has always known about the connection between all things but it's seeing that more clearly now. The energy my mind and body feels when I'm happy or hurt is something I'm contributing to this world. It's my responsibility to make it positive.
I know my goals can be achieved and my life will go according to my plan as long as I have a plan that I believe in. For now, I am dreaming it up so that I can begin creating it and turn my thoughts into things.

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