She's the BEEZIEST of all the TRANNY's

Today's guest blogger is my sister ELYSE. She wrote this for 944 magazine, where she interns at... Cute huh?

I am going to attempt to write a blog strictly in my lingo…just so I can profess the interesting change in language that has occurred amongst the younger gen. in recent decades, that I FEEL would make learning the language a tad bit difficult. I personally whip out gangsta sayings and movie quotages in daily convo, which tends to stumble my followers and there is room to say I may not make sense. But I feel that denying this slang is crapsicles. I mean I know there have been moments where I have called my hetero life mate Leigha a beezy and she was offended. Little did that tranny know, I was just referring to her beeziness in a positive beeztastic way! Needless to say, lets be surious yo. The constant abbrev’s, elongationage and match-mixing of words have led us all to concoct our own verbal dialogue foreign to anyone except our own frontal lobe. Yet I would like to give snaps to every fantastical crazy kid out there ballsy enough to whip out words like broski, rando, skeez and tranny fierocia. So go, go out into the world with your plethora of lingotastic sayings and spread them into the abyss, hopefully to befuddle and taint other slangless beings. Fo sheezy…

she'll always be young to me

No matter how old my little sister gets, I'm sure I will always feel the need to ask her if she wants me to call and wake her up or if she put all my stuff borrowed back. Isn't that why I'm an older sister after all; to boss her around! She is 22 today and has been staying with me the last month. Mostly its been a great time had by all even though there's been a few rocky patches but I think that's to be expected. For the most part we spend our time watching cooking shows (Giada and Jamie oliver), cooking which leads to drinking which leads to feeling bad about not working out. We've been trying to get out on a run mon-thurs and so far we're at about 50%. Lets just say there is much room for improvement.
Today, Elyse is working her little tush off (seen recently on cracknsmack.blogspot.com) at an event where she interns. I feel for the little munchkin and can't wait to properly cheers her over drinks and her ever favorite Thai food.
Happy Birthday munchkin head!!!!!!!!!!

Picture 1 is what I see when I look at her (I'm sure its the what my mom sees too which is why she's freaking out at the thought of her driving by herself back to Arizona)
Picture 2 is what she looked like opening mom's card (and check) this morning at breakfast.

Sex in the hot desert

My trip back to Tempe to visit Elyse and drive back to LA with her was basically planned around the opening night of Sex and The City. For the last year the plan was for us to see it together but considering we live a mere 6 hour drive from each other, I wasn't quite sure that would happen. I had a back up plan though. My adorable husbands only watched every episode a handful of times at my request so he was going to be my plus 1 IF it came to that. Lucky for him, it didn't.
I flew into Tempe on the 30th of May at 5:40pn and our movie tickets were for 7:50pm. That didn't leave much time for well anything but somehow we fit in an outfit change which I decided was not SATC worthy once we got to the outdoor mall where the movie theatre was so I popped into a store to purchase a whole new one (in less than 3 minutes!!). We also had some delicious cosmo's (of course) and aps. BUT, the most fun for me was we walked by a Tilly's store where 3 of Chadd's ads were hanging in the windows. I've never had that happen before and it was a hoot. I was standing there like a retard taking pictures of the pictures in the window.
The movie was good, not life changing by any means but it filled the spot left empty in my SATC loving heart for at least 2 hours.

So nice to meet you

my blogger, my author, my friend? MY FRIEND!!
Can you consider someone your friend after 1 shopping excursion, 1 dinner and an exchange of phone numbers? I hope so, because that would make Stephanie Klein my friend. I just adore her. Love her words, thoughts and energy. She has long since been a favorite author of mine, even inspiring me to drive 6 hours before to her last book reading and checking out her website www.stephanieklein.com nearly every day for the last 2 years. As someone who loves to read, write and express, I really enjoy finding a voice out there that could be mine but isn't. Like Stephanie, I was with a doctor and let go of a life that at some point I thought I wanted. Then, I had to make a new life, find a new path with no markers leading the way. I did, she did and we both still have it. I found love and a new zip code with Chadd and her love took her to Austin and brought her BEAUTIFUL TWINS. Now, not only do I know her on paper but I actually have hung with her and feel so blessed. To me, it feels right that I would find myself toasting her over drinks but it also shocks me and makes me count all my blessings. Phil, Stephanie's husband is very nice and down to earth too and I hope to eventually meet their adorable beans...

That's just the kind of family I married into...

I knew something was up and I was right! My sweet mother (and father) in law arranged to take care of our bill when we go to dinner tonight. We are dining at the place we got married at and sitting in the actual place that we stood a year ago and took our vows. Our wedding was amazing, especially our vows. I love that all our favorite and most important people watched us say the most amazing things to each other. Promises that we will never break and now tonight we can sort off relive that moment. Maybe just for kicks I'll bring our vows to dinner and we can whisper them to each other again.
I just feel so fortunate to have wonderful family in my life. People that I want to spend my free time with and travel with. It makes me feel so loved and cherished!

anniversaries come but once year

and its ours!!! 1 year ago today I was hustling around the Fairmont Hotel getting read to be wed! It was a wild amazing day.
This is my love letter to you babe,

I adore you wholeheartedly. You have given me my best life and enriched my soul so much. I was always waiting and hoping for a love like ours. Its happy ending love and I'm getting to fill in the story myself with you. I know that you are my one love because in the 4 years that I've been only loving and kissing you my heart has never left you for a moment. All I dream of is growing older with you. I want to hold your hand everyday of my life.
The things that bring me joy are so subtle like playing with the kitties, eating a good meal together, sniffing you and snuggling. These make the big things like traveling, planning, dancing and laughing so much better because there is depth below the fun.

love your wife,

Leigha

I smell because I'm excited!

Isn't it sad that BO is my bodies reaction to good news. My Jewish/Italian mix is letting itself be known right about now. The cause of this is that my fave blogger/author Stephanie Klein's hubby Phil called me today asking if I'd be her LA volunteer for her book readings next month. OF COURSE I'd do it! I am also putting together some goodie bags for her to raffle of that will be given away at her readings. I'm really trying to hook the readers up and so far have a massage G.C. to give away at each. I'm hoping to get some handmade goodies, wine and magazines.
I've met SK once before at a book signing but I can't wait to really meet her this time. She's more 'celebrity' to me than most of the actresses out there, so it's kind of a big deal!
Here's a pic from the last time I met her and this time I hope to look a bit less like a lesbo.